A hilarious 'needs' list

I hit upon a quiet moment during my work day and took a friend's suggestion: In quotes, google your name followed by the word needs. Here's what came up for me:

Connie Needs A New Home (actually I'm pretty happy with the one I already have...)

Connie needs to stick with doing whatever it is she does every day (Wise words - I'm easily bored but should be very happy with my days right now!)

Connie needs prayers. (No denying that one!)

Connie needs to check out her own papers (um, okay - I'll use this one as a kick in the butt to fininsh that novel already!!)

Connie needs to be done. (Turn me over! The timer dinged!)

Connie needs a massage by elves. (What? I guess any massage is a good massage)

Connie Needs Some Help... (No arguement there)

Connie needs to stay as a powerful and bitchy character (Hilarious)

Connie needs his support, no doubt about it (yep.)